Today was... better. I actually found the strength to get up and go about my day. I felt the hunger pangs, but being out of the house helped prevent me from obsessing about food so much. I have been having totally strange cravings though. I'm no longer craving the nicer things in life, like a glass of red wine or a piece of chocolate. Last night I just couldn't stop thinking about a boiled egg. How I wanted one! And after I dropped off Miriam at school, the thought of a peanut butter sandwich jumped into my head. I don't think I've had one in a year, but I just wanted a fresh piece of bread smothered in peanut butter.
Miriam almost packed it in yesterday. She simply said, "I'm too young for this. Maybe in a few years, but this is just too much!" She didn't go to gym with me before dinner last night because she was feeling weak, so while I was out I picked up a kitkat bar that I thought I could break into pieces and leave tucked away for her in case she really couldn't manage, but when I returned home she was already asleep. I figured she would call it quits in the morning, but just in case I took a few scoops out of my lunch and put it in hers and added a half an apple (part of our food budget) in her lunchbox to encourage her to hold on. In fact, she forgot her entire lunch at home in the microwave today. When I realised it I heated it up and went to meet her after class before she had zumba. I figured she'd just pick up something at the tuckshop, but in case she didn't I didn't want her sitting out on zumba and starving while she waited for me. When she saw me there she popped into the car to find out why I'd come so early. I took out her lunchbox and she was thrilled. I asked what she'd eaten and she said "nothing, we're fasting for charity." She ate up her food and went to zumba and gave it her all.
This evening I told her about the kitkat. She didn't even ask me for it. I'm really proud that she's made it this far. We're over half way through, and I know we'll see it to the end.
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